I never told you
Saturday, January 30, 2010 1:58 AM
Life hasn't been that awesome now. I just wish to curl up and die. One minute everything is perfect and the next, everything comes crumbling down.
I don't know what I'm feeling right now but for sure, it is lousy. So much for having a partner when I think it is sort of a one way. It isn't working like before. Maybe due to the several fights we had and now it is starting to get sour. And now, H is coming back into my life. I miss H like super badly. Like hello, talk about good timing here. This always happens and I will be the one on the losing end. Make the wrong move and I will lose both. No doubt there are temptations to make the move but hey, would it be a wise one? I shall succumb to that heh. I've never been good with making decisions. Talk about being decisive. Not my forte I guess. Sometimes it is difficult to commit oneself to a relationship but I'm making an effort here,mister. At times I don't believe in committing oneself in relationships. Call me old-fashioned or whatever but I think my parents brought me up the right way. Once bitten,twice shy. I don't dare to make the same mistake I did last year. Maybe I'm pms-ing here. Girls,pfft. Blaming on PMS but isn't it true?Before the time of the month, you feel like emotional and tend to think things,like thinking too much that sorta thing? I'm turning quiet in nature (HAHAHA) with family. I know I'm someone with many words but ever since Iz came into the picture, there are happy and sad thoughts. At times I do look forward for meet-ups but most of the time I'm just so lazy to get dressed and meet him even though at my void deck. I think the problem lies with me hahaha. 2 months in a few days and I'm already giving it a thought. Now, he is giving me space since he noticed that something is wrong. Am I the lucky one? On a second thought, I think I should challenge myself and be strong. I deserve him and he does too. Please let ours be a strong relationship. Amin. Learning to appreciate now.
I bet next week will be a busy week - with work and maybe meet-ups. yay shopping next week!!!!!!! Paramore or Kris Allen? Dilemma!!!!!
Family chalet tomorrow and sleeping over woooo!
On a lighter note, I'm worried for what the future may bring.
Last week:
- Work the whole week.
- Gig @ Syed Alwi with Iz, Hasree and Mirul.
- Eyecandy(s) everywhere. :B
I'm blessed with awesome humans around me. & I miss school badly. ):
Belle of the boulevard
Wednesday, January 13, 2010 2:04 PM
It's been so long since I came to this page.I've got nothing interesting to update about life.I meant no school like no life HAHA.With school everyday,at least there are some things to update about school life.You know that normal childish acts?Ha ha ha omg i miss that.
So anyway,tumblr is not helping me that much and posterous too.So I'm back to blogger which is like urrgggh.Read through all posts and memories kept flooding in.Most of it were about my time with *.I mean,it was awesome with the waiting game and things like that.Only a handful knows and hey,he's not that bad looking now.Like still an eyecandy.
I know that is not right not to have trust in a person but sometimes humans do have certain doubts towards an individual.Is it part of human norms?Well,I hope to believe that.But the evidence says it all right?
I think life has been great so far - a great boyfriend,supporting and caring family and beloved best friends whom I believe will be there for me.So far, so great. The one thing that is not helping me too much was to decide on future studies.Took a whole week off from work just to think it through and going to various polytechnics.Ha ha ha I felt like those kind of kan chiong people.But polytechnic very complicated neh.
Mother was happy for me while I do think that I did disappoint myself in certain areas.Points were very surprising indeed ha ha ha.Effort could be seen except for one subject.At least I think I’m in the fortunate lot.I do deserve a pat in the back right?I’m just waiting for my rewards now.Heh heh heh.
And blah,I miss Clementi Town very much.Wearing uniform,going school with friends,running away from teachers because of coloured socks,coloured bra and short skirt.Oh god,I miss those days.
It's been so long since I last caught up with some people.Soon yeah,soon.
I feel very angsty now wtf.
