Life hasn't been that awesome now. I just wish to curl up and die. One minute everything is perfect and the next, everything comes crumbling down.
I don't know what I'm feeling right now but for sure, it is lousy. So much for having a partner when I think it is sort of a one way. It isn't working like before. Maybe due to the several fights we had and now it is starting to get sour. And now, H is coming back into my life. I miss H like super badly. Like hello, talk about good timing here. This always happens and I will be the one on the losing end. Make the wrong move and I will lose both. No doubt there are temptations to make the move but hey, would it be a wise one? I shall succumb to that heh. I've never been good with making decisions. Talk about being decisive. Not my forte I guess. Sometimes it is difficult to commit oneself to a relationship but I'm making an effort here,mister. At times I don't believe in committing oneself in relationships. Call me old-fashioned or whatever but I think my parents brought me up the right way. Once bitten,twice shy. I don't dare to make the same mistake I did last year. Maybe I'm pms-ing here. Girls,pfft. Blaming on PMS but isn't it true?Before the time of the month, you feel like emotional and tend to think things,like thinking too much that sorta thing? I'm turning quiet in nature (HAHAHA) with family. I know I'm someone with many words but ever since Iz came into the picture, there are happy and sad thoughts. At times I do look forward for meet-ups but most of the time I'm just so lazy to get dressed and meet him even though at my void deck. I think the problem lies with me hahaha. 2 months in a few days and I'm already giving it a thought. Now, he is giving me space since he noticed that something is wrong. Am I the lucky one? On a second thought, I think I should challenge myself and be strong. I deserve him and he does too. Please let ours be a strong relationship. Amin. Learning to appreciate now.
I bet next week will be a busy week - with work and maybe meet-ups. yay shopping next week!!!!!!! Paramore or Kris Allen? Dilemma!!!!!
Family chalet tomorrow and sleeping over woooo!
On a lighter note, I'm worried for what the future may bring.
Last week:
- Work the whole week.
- Gig @ Syed Alwi with Iz, Hasree and Mirul.
- Eyecandy(s) everywhere. :B
I'm blessed with awesome humans around me. & I miss school badly. ):
